Dr. Laura Markham Family Article

December 2008 Issue --> Family Article

30 Meaningful December Traditions to Nurture Your Family

By: Dr. Laura Markham

Yearning for more family togetherness and deeper meaning this holiday season? What your kids want is meaning and connection, not perfect decorations, or lots of events, or even, ultimately, presents. Your kids need you to be in a good mood, ready to make merry and make meaning. First, just say no to everything that feels obligatory. Then, keep it simple. Don't try to create some glossy magazine vision of the holiday. In parenting, your mood matters more to your kids than anything else.

Hopefully, you already have family traditions that give you special time alone with each family member, such as a father-daughter brunch once a month at their favorite diner. You can make your holidays more meaningful, though, with this golden opportunity for one-on-one time. Make a plan with each family member to do something delicious just with them.

Some ideas for "dates" with your kids:
Work together to make a present for another family member
Bake cookies for the class party
Work out together - it's a great antidote to holiday calories and stress
Go for walks together in a part of town where you can admire the holiday decorations

Finally, pick a few traditions to share with the whole family . You'll find they gain meaning as you revisit them every year, regardless of whether you celebrate Chanuka, Kwanza, Christmas, or Solstice. The key? Relax, don't expect perfection, and be grateful for every minute of life, no matter how messy. And here's an early gift to make it easier: 30 ideas for Family Traditions to get your creativity flowing and your family smiling.

1. Invite the kids' friends over for a holiday card making party. Use construction paper, stencils and paint, line them with ordinary white paper with typed or written messages.

2. Write a winter poem together every year; paste them in a scrapbook.

3. Go through each child's room with them and create a "give-away" box of gently used items to pass on to kids who need them. Have a family session to clean and repair old toys and clothes and take them to donate.

4. Write "Appreciations" - each person in the family puts one on each of their gifts.

5. Make ornaments. Decorate felt trees with glitter, cut foil stars, make paper snowflakes. Your box of homemade ornaments will be the kids' favorite box to open every year.

6. Line your walk with luminaria -- paper bags weighted with sand, with a candle in each.

7. Spread pinecones with peanut butter and birdseed and feed the birds.

8. Have a cookie-baking party with friends. Or invite ten friends to bring over six dozen of their favorite cookies and some empty containers. Parents drink punch, kids drink hot chocolate, and everyone goes home with a mix of holiday treats from everyone else.

9. Make presents together for your kids' friends and cousins: homemade bubbles, fingerpaints, clay, dress-up boxes, jewelry-making kits, puppet-making kits, candy-making kits, snowglobes.

10. Use only recycled wrapping paper, brown paper with kids' drawings, or newspaper decorated with stickers. Wrap them all in ribbons galore.

11. Have an annual Chanuka, Kwanzaa, or tree trimming party. Or celebrate the Winter Solstice with a candlelit dinner, a roaring fire, and a night walk under the stars.

12.Celebrate snow! Cut paper snowflakes and tape them to your windows and walls. Save them and add more each winter.

13. Go gift shopping with each child separately for other family members, but make a point of connecting to that child. Take her to lunch, encourage her to try on clothes and buy her something she covets (wrap it and give it later, of course). Make sure your conversation in the car is really special.

14. Invite your kids' friends over for a pie or cookie baking party. Together, take your goodies to your local soup kitchen, home for the elderly, or to the firehouse where folks are hard at work on the holiday.

15. Have a family evening where you make holiday cards, or write them, or make gift-wrap, or wrap gifts together. Put on music and sing while you work. Don't cook that night, have pizza and eggnog.

16. Ask your kids to volunteer with you at a soup kitchen some Saturday. Buy and wrap mittens and gloves for needy families.

17. Give your children a set amount to spend and take them to the toy store where they can pick out a gift for a needy child, and let them personally deliver it to a children's hospital, homeless shelter or charity drop-off point.

18. Dreidel Showdown Night: Your family will have a "geltload" of fun taking part in an annual family dreidel tournament.You don't even have to be Jewish!

19. Go on a nature walk to gather greenery together. Bring a thermos of hot chocolate and just enjoy the fresh air.

20. Read a new holiday book with your kids every night of the season.

21. Make a menorah together out of clay, spools, or old bolts.

22. Each year, help each child make a new Christmas ornament with a photo and the year.

23. Take a walk or drive to admire the holiday lights together.

24. Buy and wrap mittens and gloves for needy families.

25. Gather your family and friends and go caroling. Afterwards, gather for hot chocolate and potluck dinner.

26. Make a treasure map or clues for your kids to follow to find their loot.

27. Watch a different holiday movie every weekend during the season.

28. Go ice skating together. Take lessons if you need to.

29. Deliver Meals on Wheels for homebound folks.

30. Write a family holiday letter together. If the idea of paragraphs is daunting, make it in the form of a list of highlights from each family member, or a newspaper or newsletter.

About the Author:

Dr. Markham, a mother and a Clinical Psychologist with a Ph.D. from Columbia University, is the founding editor of www.YourParentingSolutions.com and serves as parenting expert for Pregnancy.org, Mothering.com, and HipSlopeMama.com. She has written hundreds of articles published on over a dozen websites, and is the author of an upcoming Q&A e-book series, Ask Dr. Markham, and the soon-to-be-released, The Secret Life of Happy Moms.

All data provided on this website is to be used for information purposes only. The information contained on this website and pages within, is not intended to provide specific legal, medical, financial or tax advice, or any other advice, whatsoever, for any individual or company and should not be relied upon in that regard. The services described on this website are only offered in jurisdictions where they may be legally offered. Information provided in our website is not all-inclusive, and is limited to information that is made available to and such information should not be relied upon as all-inclusive or accurate.

Bookmark this page now...

30 Meaningful December Traditions to Nurture Your Family by Dr. Laura Markham

Stumble It!

Other Family articles enjoyed by our readers.

Makeover Your Child’s Reaction to Stress
by Patti Teel

Teen Success in Challenging Times: Practical Tips on How You Can Help Your Teen
by Bobbi DePorter

Cool School Lunches
by Cheryl Tallman and Joan Ahlers

Here's a Taste of What You'll Get With Your Subscription...

Each month you'll have access to a new issue of the online magazine that is full of fantastic resources and help from the experts that will give you motivational training, as well as the inspiration, and education that you need to Live the Story of Your Dreams!

Weekly doses of "feel good" and practical self-help tips with The Chronicles eZine…

Live Access to the Top Movers and Shakers in the world twice a month through the Real Life Legends Teleseminar Series...

It's all completely FREE and you can unsubscribe at any time!

	Click Here with questions or comments about this web site. © Copyright 2003-2010 . Healthy Wealthy nWise. All Rights Reserved. 205 W. Liberty St., Ste. 203, Charles Town, WV 25414 304.725.2502
Home \| Affiliates \| Current Issue \| Contact Us Privacy Policy \| Terms of Use \| Subscriber Agreement Questions & Tech Support